Tyler learns some lessons…

After agreeing to babysit his 4 year old nephew Tyler learnt a couple of things about children, as well as about himself.

On a walk to the park Hunter gave each of us a persona and a task. He decided he was Flash, the captain and he would lead the way to the park (which we didn’t know where it was). He commented, “I really hate monsters they make me run fast like the Flash.”

I was told I was superman (since I had a red shirt on) and was in charge of watching for cars. Tyler was to be Batman, “cos he is black and he can watch for the monsters.”

Once we reached the park, Tyler commented, “Hunter well done, you got us here.”  Hunter turned around and said, “I couldn’t have done it without you guys.”

I think the funniest part about this whole walk was that he was so serious, and not in a goofy kid way, but you could have actually believed we were on a mission, given my sister lives in a city about an hour and a half away from where I live Robyn and I had absolutely no idea where the park even was, however we decided to still let the four year old lead us, I was impressed as there were multiple turns and a decent distance to walk for a four year old to remember the whole way without even thinking about it.

Tyler started to tell me about something a larger lady had said, “The fat lady said…” and Hunter immediately injected, “hey that’s not a nice word!” Lesson number one for Tyler.

These are the other lessons Tyler claimed he learnt about kids…I’ll let him explain in his words -

You don’t give them soup – So Robyn and I saw soup on the menu at the diner that we were eating at, it sounded good so we both ordered some, well of course the four year old saw that and said, “that looks good, I wish I could have some soup” and me trying to be the great Uncle decided I would get him his own little cup of soup… well that failed, apparently four year olds don’t have the motor skills of 24 year olds and he continued to get that soup anywhere but in his mouth, and when he did he complained about how hot it was (even after repeated reminders to blow on it)

You don’t give them sticks – So on our journey to the park Hunter had picked up a tiny stick, it was pretty much a twig but he was holding it over his head and pretending like it was a flag or something, so while we walked I saw a much larger stick and decided I would pick it up and give it to him and he could upgrade his walking stick… well turns out that was a bad idea because he started swinging it and then it was too heavy and he couldn’t carry it so I had to carry  it… Then when I got the great idea that I would just get rid of the stick while he wasn’t looking he turned to me and says, “Okay, now that we are at the park where is my stick?” … yup, hard to explain that you just got rid of it.

Being in the same stall as a kid peeing is awkward – Of course he had to go to the bathroom while we were at the restaurant, and being at that age where he can’t quite go alone I had to accompany him to the bathroom. He is entirely potty trained and can do his business alone, but I needed to be there as he couldn’t get on the seat by himself as it was too high. That being said, I have never had kids, or had to be in the room with someone peeing before, so I came out and said to Robyn, “do you know how awkward it is to stand in a room with someone else who is peeing?!?” She just started laughing.

You don’t talk about things you have taken away – Hunter had gotten a coloring book at the restaurant, when it was time to eat we took the coloring book and assured him we were just putting it aside so that he could eat, he didn’t throw a fuss or seem to care as long as he got to see where it went so he could get it later. After the meal when I wasn’t even thinking about it and he had completely forgotten about the coloring book I mistakenly said the word “coloring book” to Robyn at which point sparked the attention of Hunter who now wanted his coloring book back when we had to leave… lesson learned.

He also learnt that small kids sometimes need help…or a wipe when they go potty. He learnt this but of course was way too freaked out to actually help Hunter with that…so I had to do it. Tyler FAIL!!! –Ahh yes, so this was his second bathroom trip of this babysitting tour, I was least prepared for this one. I will have you all know that I have never baby sat in my life, there is probably a reason why my family has never asked me and it probably lies somewhere in one of these stories above. That being said I love kids, I love to play with them, I just don’t like dealing with the messier details, and learned that I am entirely unprepared to be a parent some day, and if I ever was it would turn out something like the movie “big daddy.”